The Best Dog I've Ever... Okay, I can stand him. For Now.

I learned alot of new things this week... Such things as: my 5 month old is not ready for rice cereal. We tried it. She hated, despised, and wanted nothing to do with said rice cereal. It was cute to watch though...
    I learned that she can roll around the living room (oh, joy.) all by herself, after nearly yelling at the boy for ROLLING her across the floor, which we have discussed. Then I saw her continue her journey. I'm glad I didn't yell.
 
Also, I learned that despite having the mental capacity of a walnut, we really do have a great dog... I wouldn't trade him for all the sticks of butter in the world! I've learned that hes a terrible watch dog, not because he DOESN'T warn you, but because he warns you too much! I'll give you an example of his smoosh-brainedness:

Ice (Our American Bulldog): BAAAAAAAAAARARAAARARARARARARARARAAAAAH! *menacing growl, hackles up*
Me: (runs from kitchen to living room expecting to see a masked man with a bloody axe in hand climbing through my window) Oh my gosh! What IS  it dog?!
I look out the window to see what he sees... a group. Of. Squirrels? Happy squirrels. Not even squirrels intent on revenge. Squirrels with no hint of malice or murder in their eyes. Just. Plain. Squirrels. Frolicking through some leaves. Squirrels are out of sight now, and he's STILL growling. At what?
Me: Oh come on, the LEAVES?! REALLY? You're growling at LEAVES.
Ice: Lays down wagging, happy to have done his duty. He protected his house from those dangerous LEAF CREATURES!

The reason I wouldn't trade him is not because hes a fantabulous watch-animal, but because he's amazing with my kids! If you're over 4 feet tall, you can't trust him unless you know him, for hes a bity jerk. But he needed to be protective when we lived in our last neighborhood, and he retained that. Anyone knocks on the door, he will threaten to take their hand off. He's a galumphing idiot, but he knows how to avoid knocking kids over. And he 'protects' the baby from the cat. Our cat goes anywhere NEAR her, he bites him in the head. And I can put her on the floor without fear of trampling or puncture wounds. The other day I checked on her only to realize she was sound asleep with a handful of the dog's ear in clenched in her tiny fist... and he wasn't doing anything but looking confused. Which, if you know my dog, is how he usually looks anyway. He made no attempt to pull away from her, or bite her, or disturb her sleep... He DID get drool on her arm, but hey, he gets drool on everything... My three-year-old tries to make him into some kind of horse daily, and he just puts up with it like its his job... Which he does better than his watch-doggery career...